my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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