ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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