Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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