Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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