I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
this hospital has no fireball
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
