is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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