i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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