Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
