Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
