You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
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we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
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no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize