Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
