Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
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