A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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