Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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