we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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