Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
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and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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