i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I love how my cats smell like pot.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
