i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
