i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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