She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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