3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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