Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
