i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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