Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
