tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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