I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
