No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
