I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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