ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
