Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Can I color on your dick again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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