i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
