Cold hands, warm shart.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Houston, we have a blender
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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