you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
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