i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
