we're blogging at a bar
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
