why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
