everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He had one of those small greek statue penises
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
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