big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
