Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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