i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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