Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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