I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
