Pappa wants mamma naked
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
