I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
barbara walters just said penis...
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
