he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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