am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she smelled like a LAN party
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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