Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
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I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
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I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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