After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
