just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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