wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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