How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
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